When I was a kid, Saturday nights were for one thing: The Love Boat, followed by Fantasy Island. I recall one episode of Fantasy Island that scared the bejesus out of me, with the ghosts and the screaming and the involuntary loss of sphincter control. I vividly remember hiding behind the couch while the infernal racket blared from the TV.

I know other kids of my age remember the episode as the scariest touchpoint of our generation’s childhood. Is this clip, with all its camp, the piece that struck such terror into our collective psyche?

Even if it’s not, at 1:11 into the clip, tell me you don’t want to hide behind your office chair…